A Decade of Reflections

  This was our last vacation together to 

Tybee Island in 2014.

Today marks a decade...10 years.... that I have been without my daddy.  Some moments it seems like yesterday and there are days I have felt every minute of those 10 years. Gosh, I miss him...I miss his laugh, smile, wisdom, and most of all, eyes that always looked for me and truly saw me. Last night I sat and reflected as I read my journal from 10 years ago.  It was such a hard season, but I am so encouraged to look back and see God's faithfulness in so many ways.  I loved seeing my list of prayer requests for friends and family and celebrating many answered prayers today.  Today in honor of my daddy, I want to share 10 ways my daddy has impacted my life. 

1. Love when no one else is watching! Last night I was looking at pictures of Daddy and I found this one at Lily Kate's birth.  There was so much excitement and joy when she arrived.   I love this picture because I see Daddy in the background loving Taylor.  He never made a production of loving people...he loved quietly and steadily. He lived only needing an audience of one. He always made others feel valued.  He taught me to truly look for others and ask God to show me someone who needs to be seen.

Here he is loving and encouraging Ethan after he had a hard day at school.   He always took time and was so intentional to listen and love us.

2. Ask yourself each day, "Am I helping others see the Healer?"  Two weeks before his death, on October 21, 2014, I was staying with him and mom at the hospital. I had written in my journal that daddy said "I think Sissy helps us see the healer." I was walking so tenderly and closely with the Lord during that season and I pray that I will always strive to do my best to help others see our Healer, not me.  He taught me  John 30:30, "He must increase, but I must decrease."

3.  Always have a heart of thanksgiving and trust God's heart.  In the journal entry above, Daddy was praying "Dear Lord, thank you for all you do for us.  We love you God, but we don't love you like you love us.  Thank you for getting us through this time.  We love you..."  This was after the doctor had told us Daddy would be leaving us soon and Daddy had planned his funeral. What peace he had in his final days. He always taught me to trust God's heart.  I once read, "We underestimate the power that our knowing HIM has in moving HIS heart.  We underestimate the power that our moving HIS heart has on our lives." - Every Bitter Thing is Sweet :  Tasting the Goodness of God in All Things by Sara Hagerty

4.  Always make time to fellowship with others.   Take a minute to listen to this sweet message from my daddy two months before he passed away.  He often felt bad during those final months, but always made time to visit.  We often enjoyed lunch and time together.  Daddy taught me to take time to invest in relationships. Message from Daddy 9-3-2014

5.  Accept that for most of our journey on this earth, we will walk with one hand holding grief and the other hand holding joy.  Daddy taught me if we can understand and embrace this reality, we will have the compassion and love for others that Jesus modeled for us.  He taught me that most of the time, we do not know the stories and scars that others carry.

Hebrews 12:1-3 says " Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us,  fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."

6.  Always work hard, be patient, and honor your word.  Daddy was such a hard worker and took great pride in a job well done.  He was a dedicated employee who always showed up with a servant attitude and would follow through and stick with it through completion.  He taught me that work ethic beats intelligence every time.

7.  Fight for your Freedom!  The last 10-15 years I had with Daddy he taught me to fight for my spiritual freedom.  He introduced me to freedom prayer.  Daddy had a hard childhood and he fought darkness and learned to lean on the Lord.  His legacy and dedication to God changed our family legacy and broke generational curses.  

Colossians 1:13-14 says, " For He has rescued us and has drawn us to Himself from the dominion of darkness, and has transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son, in whom we have redemption [because of His sacrifice, resulting in] the forgiveness of our sins [and the cancellation of sins’ penalty]."

8.  As best as you can, keep no record of wrong.  Daddy taught me to forgive quickly.  Do not hold someone's mistake over their head.  When someone fails, do not throw it back in their face.  I have made so many mistakes and pushed the limits as a teenager.  Daddy always had open arms.  He would gently address the mistake, hold me accountable and I  would have consequences, but then he would never bring it up again.  He truly showed me unconditional love with no strings attached.

9. LAUGH and have a sense of humor.  Enjoy Life!  Daddy always loved to hear a joke.  Ted will still talk about his laugh.  He would always look for the lighter side of a situation and make a joke.  He truly enjoyed life and was truly present in each day.  He didn't rush ahead to tomorrow or waste time looking back at yesterday.  Daddy wrote this on a whiteboard one day when he was helping Mom clean the house.  Daddy taught me to not take life to seriously.  Enjoy it!

10. Live each day focused on eternity.  I know that my daddy heard, "Well done, good and faithful servant."  Daddy taught me if I can rest in this mindset, the things of this earth will grow strangely dim and I will be able to more clearly see the things that really matter. 

So to my daddy, may we cherish his memory and honor him with our lives until we see him again on that beautiful shore in the Sweet By and By.